Desperate Counsel

Our party stand victorious upon Skull Gorge Bridge. After protracted debate it agreed that the bridge must be destroyed, but not before scouting on ahead to see this Red Hand horde for themselves.

The Red Hand does not disappoint. The encampment hold thousands, including hobgoblins, goblin worg riders, giants, a red dragon and countless other monstrous creatures. Further protracted debate (including a suggestion that the party Leeroy the army) wisely leads the SRaO to retreat. With the application of a little expert stonemasonry the bridge goes down. The party head back to Drellin’s Ferry (draggin’ the dragon’s head behind them), secure in the knowledge that they have significantly delayed their foes’ plans.

Back at Drellin’s Ferry the party’s news is greeted with disbelief and horror. A council meeting is called, but before the party can reach it a gang of joyriding goblins atop a juvenile delinquent chimera (apparently called Bollix) land in the marketplace and set about slaughtering the townsfolk.

The party make short work of the intruders, with Jerell’s mind-bending compulsion powers in particular leading the Chimera a merry dance. Brick knocks one of the goblins out, and there is some uncertainty as to his motives. Not surprising perhaps, given Brick’s history with goblins.

Brick : As a minor action…
Habbakuk: …you sodomise the unconscious goblin?
DM: Sodomy is not a minor action.
Habbakuk: It is for Brick.

The goblin is revived and the party threaten it with a variety of  torture techniques including

  • Water-boarding in the village fountain (it’s an essential measure to ensure the security of the region
  • Demonic soul leeching (including the drawing of chalk pentagrams around the hapless prisoner)
  • Head-shaving (don’t ask me)

All this creativity ultimately proves fruitless, as all the party are able to discover is that the goblin can’t count, and that he serves the “Big Blue Master”.

The party quickly persuade the council that they must evacuate the village and retreat to the safety of Brindol’s walls. By the power of montage the SRaO are soon at the head of a wagon train heading east. A rider approaches and asks what’s going on.

“We’re evacuating in the face of a goblin invasion” replies Brother Bryn, causing the rest of the party to spit out their breakfast. The rider does an admirable job of keeping a straight face, and informs them that the Rhest trail to the north is blocked by ogres and hobgoblins. Being stupid and reckless (though these days less frequently overwhelmed) the party commandeer horses and set off towards Rhest.

One Response to “Desperate Counsel”

  1. Great session again. Shout out to Carl for giving us something to kill (or attempt sexual assault on).

    Who’s in for next week.

    I’ll have a medium Hawaiian.

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