Archive for April, 2013

Best Babygrow EVER!

Posted in Uncategorized with tags on April 28, 2013 by Stefan

RAWR! Thanks you Carl and Co for the fantastic geeky grow 🙂

I think he is in the process of levelling up as a Fighter or Barbarian, out of 100 babies he is the 5th heaviest and 2nd longest (as you can see he is nearly outgrowing the 3-6 month baby grows, at 10 weeks old)…he will be flinging battle axes in no time .

Again a million thanks, its the best present he has got so far by miles! 😉



Session Report: Mines of Madness part 3

Posted in Session Reports: Other on April 27, 2013 by Carl

The party get HugHug to shake the dwarven statue’s hand, and a magic mouth appears, granting them the answers to three questions. After some deliberation the party decide what to ask:

Q: “Where is the Forever Stone?”
A: “Beyond the mad wizard’s chamber.”

Q: “How do we get to the mad wizard’s chamber?”
A: First you must pass through the hidden door; then a sacrifice must be made; then you must pass steel, stone and flesh; then you must solve the final riddle.”

Q: “Where is the hidden door?”
A: “The gargoyle can answer that question.”

The party return to the gargoyle/ statue, remove the pants from its head and shout orders at it, prod it, hit it with hammers and the like. No dice. They follow its gaze and discover a secret door in the wall opposite the gargoyle, but no amount of brute force will open it. The party are stumped.

Giving up on the gargoyle they investigate the phantom miner and the moaning chamber. Exercising uncharacteristic wisdom they decide not to go anywhere near the twisted moaning portal, and decide instead to turn to divine inspiration (they phone Russell to help them). This conversation unearths a vital nugget of information; they have not asked the gargoyle any questions.

The gargoyle, utterly inert until now, responds when asked direct questions. When asked how the secret door can be open it mutters “Bugger. Glitterdark.” And the door swings open.

Beyond lies a chamber with a sacrificial altar. Figuring that a sacrifice is required the cleric and elven ranger leap upon the hapless HugHug and stab him to death, hurling his twitching corpse onto the altar. Nothing happens. Then they take the bag of green goo (that used to be a bag of electrum pieces (that used to be a dwarven warrior)) and stab that too. This seems to do the trick; unlike HugHug the transmuted dwarf is a willing sacrifice; an obsidian stone block slides back revealing an exit.

By offering the diamond pick the party get past a huge iron golem, then avoid a fight with a giant bat and charm a giant cave cricket called Trevor to lead them out of the chamber. Charlie, having lost yet another character, is now playing Trevor.

They avoid getting impaled by piercers, keep out of the clutches of a purple worm (do worms have clutches?) and find themselves at a door with a series of dwarven runes carved into small brass plates. It seems one rune from each row must be depressed.

Forgetting that they are in a D&D adventure he party then spend the best part of an hour applying Bletchley Park-level codebreaking techniques to the problem. The net result is lots of damage as they trigger the trapped door with one failed try after another.

Finally the cleric cracks the puzzle; using one letter from each line he spells out the word UNLOCK. The door swings open to reveal a chamber with robed and seated skeletal figure, impatiently drumming its bony fingers on the arm of its throne.





Once again plenty of confusion, paranoia and two more party members killed in the Mines of Madness. Better yet, both of those were murdered by their own companions! This is putting me in the mood to run the Tomb of Horrors! Any takers?

Games Night: Friday April 26th

Posted in General on April 25, 2013 by Carl

I can host, Sean and Charlie are in, I’m up for running the next session of the Mines of Madness D&D Next module. Jo has hinted she may make an appearance; who’s in? Come on, you know you want to!

The Devil’s Riddle: Session 26

Posted in The Devil's Riddle on April 21, 2013 by Carl

Cayleb begins to back away down the corridor, his face white with terror. “This… this isn’t happenin’!” he stammers.  “It ain’t! It’s… you’re all nuts, yeah, yer tryin’ ta spook me, well it’s not gonna work’ see? Cayleb Marsh is nobody’s fool! I was just in this for the coin, but this is crazy stuff yer mixed up in, an’ I want no part of it! I’m gone!”

Lisandra steps towards him, hands raised. “Don’t you see, Cayleb? There is no-where else to go. This is everywhere. Darkness is coming, and there is no-where you can run. We fight, together, or we fall.”

Cayleb looks trapped, too scared to stay, too scared flee. “Fight?” he whines, “Are you mad? How can we fight?”

Tomas has a look of barely suppressed fury on his face. His whole body trembles with rage. “How can we not? Whatever tortured and murdered those men, I will see it pay!”

Rufus, who has been deep in thought, looks up. “We can fight, and we will. It is as it is written in the Book of Seven Swords; “You must know the battlefield before you go to war”. Well, at least we now know the battlefield.”

“And perhaps that knowledge grants us a new way to fight” Lisandra muses. “We have already seen that our foe uses desecrated ground to summon more agents of the Dark to his side. Each corrupted place, such as this inn or the monastery, serves as a potential staging point to further reinforce the enemy.

“But what if we were able to disrupt his supply lines? If I could channel enough of the Source into this place perhaps I could reverse the effect, consecrate this ground and deprive our foe of a valuable resource.”

Rufus places a hand on the channeler’s shoulder and there is concern in his voice. “Can you do this? Surely such a feat is beyond even your abilities.”

Lisandra returns his gaze. “I believe so. It will not be easy, but I must try. Help me to prepare, my friend.”

Lisandra spends the next hour seated cross-legged in silent contemplation. Then, almost imperceptibly at first, she begins to glow. Shadows flicker back and forth across the room and beads of sweat form on her brow. Her teeth clench as she focuses her will; she wields the Source like a surgeon’s scalpel, cutting away at the corruption. But the Darkness fights back; shadows driven back by her power suddenly lash out like razors, and blood flows freely from the wounds they inflict. Lisandra ignores the pain, ignores everything except the power of the Source; with one final scream light bursts from her, banishing the shadows and momentarily blinding her companions.

When vision returns Lisandra is lying slumped upon the floor, blood pooling around her. Rufus is first to her side, feeling desperately for a pulse. Her eyes flicker open, and there is triumph in them. “It is done” she whispers. “Their magic can be beaten!”

The Devil’s Riddle: Session 25

Posted in The Devil's Riddle on April 15, 2013 by Carl

Rufus is about to turn away when a glint of metal catches his eye. He reaches out and tugs free a gore-smeared chain from the neck of one of the corpses. The golden pendant dangling at the end of the chain is instantly recognizable; a grinning devil’s head encircled within a question mark.

“I’ve seen a few of these about in the village” Fyn notes, keeping his eyes firmly away from the scene of butchery inside the room. “Just good luck charms I figured, a ward against the Dark.”

Lisandra leans heavily against the wall. “I fear you could not be further from the truth” she says unsteadily. “This token is of the Dark, a means of singling out those touched by it, of reaching them across great distance. These things were what allowed the Harvesting ritual to be carried out in absentia, and I begin to understand something of that ritual’s purpose…” She tails off, her brow knitting in concentration.

When she does not continue for several moments Idril is the first to lose patience. “Well? Come on, out with it lass! What reason could there be fer such unholy acts?”

“Do you not feel it?” Lisandra asks. “Do you not sense the change in this place?”

The others look to one another. “It feels… colder” Tomas ventures. “I feel ill at ease, but surely that is just the result of what I have seen, no?”

“In part” Lisandra answers, “but far more than that. The ritual has defiled this place irrevocably, it has become desecrated ground, just as the monastery was. As there, the Source is distant to me now in this place, and the power of the Dark is greatly strengthened. This place is now closer to the Dark.

“And I think I begin to understand at last something of the nature of our enemy, and of the true scale conflict we face. Rufus, we came here from our own world, one that exists in parallel to this one, did we not? The portal stone that we used, powered by the Source, was capable of taking us to any one of countless parallel worlds. Imagine those worlds layered side by side in an endless series. Above them all one Source, and below them, one Darkness. Just as the portal stone allowed us to transverse the Source to reach another reality, so too can the Dark be used to travel between worlds. The Dark and the Source touch every reality. That explains the presence of the High Cantor; but it suggests something far greater.”

The others stare back at her, expressions varying from blank incomprehension to growing horror.

Lisandra fixes them with an unblinking gaze. “This war is not just for the world I left behind, or for this one. It is a war across the whole of existence, a battle for every reality there is!”

Session Report: Mines of Madness part 2

Posted in Session Reports: Other on April 15, 2013 by Carl

The rather depleted party go exploring in the lower levels of the mine. It turns out to be quite an eventful outing.

  • The cleric, last seen disappearing down the purple worm’s gullet, appears (in what he claims is a flash of divine intervention) at the top of the mineshaft, and lands with a hard bump at the bottom.
  • The party ignore the cries of a phantom miner stuck down a mine shaft
  • The elf opens a door with the message “one good turn deserves another” and the dwarf is turned into 98 electrum pieces. It might be 100, but 98 is all they find.
  • The party discover a hammer in a recess with the notice “In case of beserk golem break glass”. They do not break the glass.
  • The elf, sure he has worked things out, tosses the electrum pieces that used to be the dwarf through a hole in the magic door, which from this side has the message “See through me, See through you”. The electrum coins are turned into translucent green goo.
  • They head up some stairs and find the other end of the endless passage from last session. They refuse to enter.
  • They head back downstairs, find a statue that they are pretty sure is really a gargoyle playing possum, and tie it up. Nothing happens. They stick pants on its head and shoot arrows at it. Nothing happens. They say “I know you’re alive”, and still nothing happens. Bored, they open a nearby door and the cleric gets impaled by a spear.
  • They find a circular chamber with a dead adventurer in it and an illusionary gem at the center. Convinced this is a trap of some sort they circumvent the gem, head up some stairs and find themselves in a chamber with a dwarf statue, it’s hand outstretched. Upon shaking the statue’s hand the halfling is told “Be sure to have the pick or hammer if you face the golem”, the elf is told “beware the green dragon”, and the cleric is set upon by stirges.
  • The party find a secret door which turns out to be a mimic. Pseudopod-related hijinks ensue.
  • The party find a chamber full of giant chickens busily pecking at an overturned mine cart. The heroes recognize their foes as cockatrices, and Moonpie the halfling confirms it by getting turned to stone.
  • The remaining two party members rescue HugHug the goblin from beneath the wagon. HugHug is big-eyed, innocent, full of hugs, and never ever mentions jizz or AIDS. Charlie gets to play him.

Only two characters killed this week, I’m obviously slipping. However the party have explored every area they can find in the mines, and are stumped as to what to do next. So that’s good.

Tune in next week for more aimless frustrated wandering, hopefully followed by senseless slaughter.

The Devil’s Riddle: Session 24

Posted in The Devil's Riddle on April 11, 2013 by Carl

“Stay here” whispers Rufus to the rest of the party, and creeps up the stairs to the tap room. It is completely deserted. Despite the late hour the room is lit by a flickering orange glow. The blademaster moves silently to a window and peers out at the village of Tylon; several buildings are furiously ablaze, sheets of sparks spiralling up into the night sky.

But what alarms Rufus the most is the total absence of villagers. No-one is trying to fight the fires or flee the flames. He doesn’t even see bodies, as he would expect had the village been attacked. Just like the inn, the entire village seems to be deserted.

“One problem at a time” he grunts to himself as he returns to the others and recounts his findings. “Whatever has befallen Tylon, we have more pressing matters to attend to. Like getting Tomas to a bed before he bleeds out.”

Rufus, Cayleb and Idril take turns at watch while the others fall into deep and deserved sleep.

Dawn is just breaking when their rest is shattered by blood curdling shrieks of agony. Still in his nightshirt Rufus leads the charge down the hall and flings a door open, sword at the ready. The sight that greets him causes even the hardened warrior to turn white with horror.

The two rescued captives hang suspended in the air above their beds, thrashing in indescribable pain as the skin is slowly peeled from their bodies. Blood spatters the room, spraying from the men in all directions as their shrieks climb in pitch and intensity. But there is no-one in the room with them.

Then abruptly the two men flip upright, still hanging in the air, glistening masses of bloody muscle and raw exposed flesh. Their cries cease, and their eyes meet the Bladesingers. In voices ripped from the pits of hell the two speak in unison; “The Harvest is complete. Hail to the Fury! Hail to the Glory that Was and Will Be!”

Then, like puppets with strings cut, the two fall lifeless to their beds.